Fear and nervousness outside the comfort zone

Conventional wisdom states that we only grow when we step outside our comfort zone this is different than facing our fears however. Our comfort zone is filled with all the things we are used to doing, the things we understand, and the things that are easy for us. When we step outside in to the wilds of discomfort we start to feel uneasy, and nervous. Why? Because there is a chance we might fail, and it might happen publicly. But as you spend time in the wilds you start to clear the land build a camp site, in other words make that territory yours and as the new skill becomes easier the wilds become part of your comfort zone.

In our society fear and nervousness are often confused. Nervousness is that quivering in our stomach that says I don't like this and happens when we think that something might harm us. Fear, real fear is a powerful instinctive force that we cannot resist without help and training. Fear shows up when we stop knowing that something can hurt us and know that it will unless we act. Stepping outside our comfort zone should not make us afraid but does often make us nervous.

When we try something new, when we reach for our goals we often feel nervous and anxious. We worry that we will fail that we will be laughed at or that people will mock us. What we must realize is that if we want to create a better life for our self first true failure is stagnation. The entire concept of creating a better life for ourselves is rutted in the principle that we are not satisfied with were we are today. I would rather try and fail publicly then to sit and stagnate. Why? I can walk away from the mocking voice of others; the voice inside my own head that tells me I am not achieving what I could is something I can not escape.

What are your thoughts? Let me know I n the comments and stay safe but keep growing and as always have a great day.

Getting my head in the game

Ok time to change my mind set. I woke up this morning tired and grouchy school starts in two hours and I need to get my head in the game. Coffee is helping but chemical mood enhancers are not the answerer but what is? There are a lot of tricks, mental kicks in the pants so to speak that we can give ourselves to put our heads in the right place.

Music: A classic time honored Way to change your mood. No other form of art has such a direct impact on our emotional state then music. Even just a few minutes to listen to the right song or two can put us back on track.

Success: Find something to succeed at that is quick and easy, a video game, a puzzle, a martial arts form something that can be done quickly with a degree of assured success but enough difficulty that we have to work for it. Wining makes us happy.

Rituals: If we have little things we do to prepare ourselves for the day these can go a long way to creating the proper mind set. We recently started using a French press for our coffee and the process of making the coffee is becoming a divider between my wake up time and the productive part of the day.

Exercise: A few pushups or a quick jog can not only get the blood flowing but release some of the tension we are holding on to.

Clean: Straiten up your desk, pick up your room do the dishes. It can be difficult, if not impossible to think clearly in a cluttered and messy space.

Act: Act how you feel. If you do not have the time to do even a quick exercise to get yourself in a better frame of mind just consciously externalize the emotion you want on the inside. Our body posture and facial expression can radiate inward as much as outward.

The bottom line is that when we need to change our mood we need to make a break of some kind with the mental space that has the bad feeling and the new one we want to have. Creating a boundary event for the bad mood draws a line in the sands of time saying that was how I felt then and this is how I feel now.

A quick note on the links here some are internal some are external, some of them are spot on others are tangential to the topic; all of them are good articles worth reading. Have a great day and if you have any thoughts on quick mood alteration let me know.