Monday, February 1, 2010

Meet adversity head on

Life will throw you curve balls, it's a given. Sometimes we hit them out of the park and we see them as opportunities. Other times we pick up a strike and move on. Then there are the times that the pitch hits us. What do you do when the random and tumultuous nature of life leaves you hurting, emotionally, physically, and financially? Often times when this sort of trouble comes in to your life the only on you have to count on is yourself and those whose lives are tide to yours, spouses lovers parents and siblings. While this help from outside is nice and useful the most important resource we have is our own attitude in the face of adversity.

The first thing to understand is to make time for grief. Every situation will be different sometimes there is an opportunity for grief and regret out front other times action is needed right away and we must put our feeling aside and get the job done. Either way it is important to understand that grief and sadness are natural and should be allowed to take their course. When we work too hard to push these so called negative emotions out of our lives we create more emotional baggage for ourselves.

When life has hit us with a gut punch it is easy to retreat and curl up in a nice safe place and shut the world out. This does not work; the hardships and bad times in our lives are patient bullies. They are willing to wait outside our door all day and night while we hide in our beds but when we step outside they are ready to take our lunch money once again. Like a bully the problems in our life only go away when we stand up to them. Action is the key to overcoming. As finding the right time to grieve will be different each situation has its own set of actions that need to be taken in order to find resolution.

These actions are not always obvious or clear or easy that is one reason it is important to have a network of support in place. We all must have our trusted advisers, those people who we can turn to who we know have our best interest at hart. This is another key to overcoming hardship we should not do it alone. When we find ourselves in adversity it often times will bruise our ego and we become afraid of what people will think of us if they find out. Those people in your life who love you love you. They want what is best for you and will help you in any way they can. It should be noted here that a true friend will most likely give the help that we need (if they are able) rather than the help that we want. Be grateful for the help that is given whether it was what you asked for or not.

The other key element to overcoming adversity is to learn. Every hard ship and every joy in our lives brings lessons we can learn. We can come to understand ourselves better and we can figure out what we did to contribute to the situation at hand. We can see the things we did or the things we did not do that caused a situation to come in to existence and in the future devise a plan to change our course of action. This is not just a key to overcoming hardship this is a key to growing as a person: learn from your mistakes and your accomplishments in equal measure.

So when life gets ruff and scary take a moment to gather your thoughts, your emotions and stand up to the monsters and beasts in your life. Only through rational, responbul action and the help of good friends can we get through the tuff times.


Shelly Rayedeane said...

I agree completely. Avoiding issues does not help resolve a problem because the cycle will only repeat itself until the lesson is learned.

Quinn said...

Thanks for stopping by Shelly. If there was one lesson I could have learned earlier in my life this would be it. deal with it now so it does not come back.

JACQUI said...

Life isn't always easy but so often, there is an opportunity for growth and learning in each 'obstacle'. I've used many of my own experiences as an insight into how other people might be feeling, thereby (hopefully) enabling me to say the 'right' thing. So, as the old saying goes, every cloud has a silver lining.

Quinn said...

On a related note Jacqui, I think each hardship we under go gives us a greater understanding of others and wit that a greater depth of compassion.

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