Monday, December 7, 2009

Reclaiming the battle field

In all our lives we have suffered failures that have left our self image laying limp and lifeless on the muddy battlefield. Sometimes the scars of these battles have become the seeds of low self confidences or shyness or another defeatist attitude. No matter what the attitude is it will hamper our growth and stops us from living the life we want. Today we are going to talk about going back and gaining victories on that battlefield, taking back what has been taken from us and using that energy to reclaim the life we want.

Before we go any farther I want to make it clear this is not a fix for every problem and every failure in your life. As tools go this one is more of a hammer then it a multi tool. It will do one thing and do it well so it is up to you to know when to use it.

As I announced last week I am going back to school. I have decided to start my course work at my local junior college for a few reasons, it is convenient to where I live, it is cheap to go there (comparatively) and it is a good school. While all those were factors in my decision they were not the main reason I have chosen to return to the JC. This school is one of the places where I feel I have been defeated in the past and I want to get a victory there in order to help build my scholastic confidences.

When I did my first few trips to collage I was there for the wrong reasons: It was what you did after high school, my parents wanted me to go to school and it was better than working full time. However I went in with no real idea of what I wanted to get out of the processes so instead of getting an education I sat in the student lounge and learned to play bridge. Because of this I never left the junior college for a four year school and I have spent my life drifting from jobs that require more training then education. These jobs have left me feeling unsatisfied and rather unworthy of many of the things I want in life.

Now I am going back to school and I am starting were I have faltered before to prove to myself I can win on this battlefield. This time I am coming armored in purpose, armed with a set of goals I wish to achieve and with my life map and personal compass ready to consult should I find myself drifting off course. When I win this battle I know that I will be able to use the momentum I gain from it to bring me to the end of my studies and out the other side to a job I want and can take pride in.

So how can we generalize this tactic? This idea is simple but the execution can be hard or downright scary. Think of a situation that went badly solely based on your action. Now try to recreate that situation and relive it in a positive way. Use the self understanding and growth you have undergone since your defeat to not only take the field again but to win. Part of this process is knowing when to pick the fight, do it on your terms and your own time.

This advice may seem general at first and it is each battle we face will require different tactics but at the same time if we do not choose to refight our old battles then we are left with the defeat. Taking up arms and challenging the events in our lives that have created our negative attitudes will help us create a new positive mind set. If you have any thoughts or questions I would love to hear them in the comments below. Be valiant, be brave and have a great day

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